The holiday season is a time marked by festive lights, busy calendars, and family traditions that can be both comforting and challenging.
While this season often brings joy, it can also be a source of significant emotional and mental strain. From the pressure to create the “perfect” holiday experience to the sensory overload of crowded spaces and the resurfacing of complex family dynamics, it’s no surprise that many find themselves feeling overwhelmed.
Understanding and addressing these stressors is key to navigating the holidays in a healthier way to avoid hitting a breaking point. You can maintain a sense of balance amid the seasonal hustle by recognizing your triggers and learning effective emotional regulation strategies. This article explores practical tips and evidence-based techniques, including Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) tools, to help you stay grounded and resilient.
Know Your Overstimulation Triggers
First things first: Know what gets under your skin during the holidays. For some, it might be the endless noise and visual clutter. For others, it’s the tension of being around family members who don’t exactly bring out the best in you. Maybe it’s the pressure to attend too many events or the financial stress of gift-giving.
Take some time to reflect. You might even jot down a list of situations that have historically overwhelmed you during the holidays. Once you’ve identified your triggers, you can create a plan for managing them effectively.
Grounding Techniques: Finding Calm in the Moment
When overstimulation hits, grounding techniques can be your best friend. These methods work by pulling you out of your racing thoughts and back into the present moment. Here are a few to try:
1. The 5-4-3-2-1 Technique
o Name five things you can see.
o Name four things you can touch.
o Name three things you can hear.
o Name two things you can smell.
o Name one thing you can taste.
Side Note: To make this technique most effective, try to be as detailed as possible. For example, rather than just noticing “a chair,” describe its color, texture, or shape. Engaging your senses in this way keeps your mind anchored in the present and reduces anxiety.
2. Box Breathing
o Inhale deeply for four counts.
o Hold your breath for four counts.
o Exhale slowly for four counts.
o Hold your breath again for four counts. Repeat this cycle a few times, and notice how your body begins to relax.
3. Grounding Through Sensation If you’re feeling untethered, try focusing on a single physical sensation. Wrap your hands around a warm mug of tea, hold a piece of ice, or rub a soft blanket between your fingers. These tactile experiences can help anchor you.
DBT Emotion Regulation Skills
DBT, or Dialectical Behavior Therapy, was originally developed to help people manage extremely intense emotions. Here are a few techniques that are especially helpful during the holiday season:
1. Check the Facts Sometimes, our emotions can spiral because we’ve interpreted a situation in a way that’s not entirely accurate. For example, if someone declines your holiday party invitation, you might immediately assume they don’t care about you. But is that the full story? Maybe they’re overwhelmed themselves or have a scheduling conflict. Taking a moment to “check the facts” can help you approach situations with more clarity and less emotional charge.
2. Opposite Action When an emotion is intense but not serving you, “opposite action” can be a lifesaver. For instance, if you’re feeling annoyed and want to avoid a family gathering, showing up with a positive attitude might actually shift your mood. It’s not about faking it—it’s about choosing actions that align with the kind of experience you want to have.
3. PLEASE Skills The holidays can wreak havoc on our physical and emotional health, which is why DBT’s PLEASE skills are essential:
o Physically healthy: Get enough sleep, eat nourishing foods, and stay hydrated.
o Low substances: Minimize alcohol and caffeine, which can amplify stress.
o Exercise: Even a quick walk can boost your mood.
o Avoid being overstimulated: Give yourself breaks from noisy or crowded environments.
o Sleep: Prioritize good sleep hygiene, even if it means leaving the party early.
o Eat: Nutritious foods help stabilize your mood and energy levels, making it easier to handle stress and reduce emotional swings
Set Boundaries (and Stick to Them!)
We’ve all been there: saying yes to too many commitments because we don’t want to disappoint anyone. But overextending yourself is a fast track to burnout. This year, give yourself permission to set boundaries.
· Limit Your Social Calendar: Choose a few events that matter most and politely decline the rest. “Thanks so much for inviting me, but I’m keeping my schedule light this year” is a perfectly acceptable response.
· Create Quiet Time: Block off time in your schedule for rest, even if it’s just 20 minutes of quiet each day.
· Be Honest About Gift-Giving: If finances are tight, suggest alternatives like a Secret Santa exchange or homemade gifts.
Don’t Forget the Basics
Sometimes, the best way to manage emotions is by doubling down on the basics. Are you eating regularly? Drinking enough water? Taking time to stretch or move your body? These small acts of self-care can make a world of difference.
If you’re prone to sensory overload, consider keeping a “holiday survival kit” with you. Noise-canceling headphones, a soothing scent like lavender oil, or even a simple fidget toy can help you stay grounded.
When All Else Fails: Take a Pause
If you’re feeling emotionally flooded, it’s okay to hit the pause button. Step outside for fresh air, retreat to a quiet room, or even excuse yourself to the bathroom if that’s the only private space available. Giving yourself a few moments to reset can prevent minor frustrations from escalating into major meltdowns.
Final Thoughts
The holidays don’t have to be a rollercoaster of stress and overstimulation. By understanding your triggers, grounding yourself in the present, and using tools like DBT’s emotion regulation skills, you can navigate this season with more ease and grace. Remember: It’s perfectly okay to prioritize your well-being. After all, the most meaningful holiday moments are the ones you’re fully present for.
Take it one moment at a time, and give yourself the gift of self-compassion this season. You’ve got this!
Check out our Stress Relief Collection for some helpful calming products HERE.
About the Author:
Paige Whitley is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Florida. With over 3 years of dedicated experience, Paige has become a trusted ally for diverse populations, including the neurodivergent community, trauma survivors, substance abuse sufferers, and those navigating general mental health challenges. Since 2010, Paige has impacted young lives through her work as a lifeguard, swim teacher, behavior technician, nanny, and counselor. When not at work, she indulges in the magic of Disney Parks, enticing culinary adventures, and family time with her husband, fur babies, and baby Whitley. Passionate and empathetic, she's a catalyst for positive change, committed to making a difference in her community's mental health landscape.
Quick Read Version:
Feeling overwhelmed this holiday season? The hustle and bustle can be challenging, but small steps can make a big difference.
· Identify your triggers
· Practice grounding techniques (like the 5-4-3-2-1 method)
· Use emotion regulation strategies to stay balanced
Your well-being matters—make space for calm and connection this season.